What Your Votes in Sai Mecha 2012 Round One Earth Side Say About You

[Vote Here]

LET’S GET IT ON! The fight has officially started and I have drawn the sword of truth to point out with righteousness the way to vote in this most awesome of tournaments.

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Variable Colony Carrier Super Robot vs. Fake Real Robot

I changed it up a bit, given that Gurren Lagann is the ultimate possibility machine there are modes and modes to choose from, each more epic than the previous. If you vote for the fake real robot, it means you like putting up a front – like you’re supposed to be cool and realistic and scientific and shit. But the truth is you want to power things with your will, your hot blood, only that you have neither, because you suck.

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Ultimate melee Gundam vs. Slower than Giant Robo (unpossible)

Giant robots have guns and cannons, but almost always they end up in each other’s faces and hack each other up with melee weapons. The Gundam Exia is the finest expression of this ideal; combining speed, agility, and an incredible humanoid silhouette that effortlessly wears a large arsenal of weapons. The way it fights is exciting and fast-paced, maximizing the possibility of the animated medium. The Big O is slow and fights slow and ugly, substituting pomp for actual combat effectiveness. The Exia will cut it to shreds, and all the fanboy gnashing of teeth won’t be able to stop it. Useless size is something overcompensating retards truly love.

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Pilot can be taken out by small arms fire vs. God of Song that Tunes the World

IT DOESN’T MATTER IF I PILOT A HUMONGOUS MECHA IF DAVID WITH A GODDAMN SLINGSHOT CAN TAKE ME OUT BECAUSE SOME IDIOT DESIGNED THIS COCKPIT. Some idiot fanboy will attempt to extend this farce by spinning this into some statement about the police officer pilot’s badassery. RahXephon doesn’t even have to facepalm from shame of being in this matchup. He has wings on his face, like a God.

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Takumacallit moeshit vs. DEAD PEOPLE POWER ME TO MAKE PEOPLE DEAD machine

Some idiots voted in this stupid magic robot piece of junk with no real expectation it will win. They don’t even want a robot to win Sai Mecha. Some douchebags just want to watch the world burn. On the other hand, some people actually like mecha, even if they’re 2nd-rate Macross derivatives, because Z Gundam… Tomino Yoshiyuki put some special sauce in this one… putting to use all them characters he keeps murdering (in order to kill some more). That’s something robot fans can get behind.

Shin Getter Robo vs. Hades Project Zeorymer

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One fights super ugly robots by rubbing together three super ugly robots to form escalations of ugly crap. The other lays low enemies (and everything else) by rubbing its balls together. Zeorymer is baller and the new Getter Robo is the same old shit. Well, some people are super loyal to the stink they love. Other people appreciate a damn good robot.

Realer than thou-art vs. The Sheer Joy of Robot Design Freedom

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Some people will vote for the thing that lays their fantasies low, that puts a fake ceiling on the fantasy that is super robot anime and calls it realism, because they are fake-loving losers. None of them actually want this piece of trash to win Sai Mecha, no one. But they congratulate themselves for liking this over actual triumphs in mecha design because they’re that inauthentic. The limitations of surfing as a spectator sport is how the whole thing is on sea-level, and the surfer is often obscured by the wave she rides. It’s just as much about the waves as it is the surfing. Take out the big waves and put the surfer in the sky, make the thing move in all directions, including climbing straight up… a cut back drop turn, and plunge straight down in a deadly attack. Then make it a giant robot. Easiest vote ever.

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VF-25 Messiah vs. Mazinger Z

It’s a shame only one can go through this round. The Messiah is an ambitious name for what really is a mass-produced military fighter, the perfect one. Mazinger Z is the god itself. It’s the perfection of the real robot ideal (not the realistic robot faggotry, mind you) vs. the prototype of the super robot ideal we remember love for. Macross Frontier reminded me of my first contact with real robots, only much faster, more amazing. Mazinger Z Shogeki Hen reminded me of my first contact with violent robot anime, only more awesome.

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Delphine vs. Mazinkaiser SKL

It’s a shame only one can go through this round. The Delphine and its field modifications confounding its opponents made Broken Blade actually watchable and awesome. But there will be dolts who will vote for it because they like the story especially in manga form. Ugh. Mazinkaiser SKL needs even far less of a story as an excuse to inflict medieval carnage in a fantasy  battlefield. The Delphine is a fantasy real robot, SKL is a fantasy super robot. Both emerge from the bowels of the earth, but only one does it in a truly awesome way. The answer should be obvious, and thus my vote.

About ghostlightning

I entered the anime blogging sphere as a lurker around Spring 2008. We Remember Love is my first anime blog. Click here if this is your first time to visit WRL.
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31 Responses to What Your Votes in Sai Mecha 2012 Round One Earth Side Say About You

  1. Turambar says:

    1. If Bonta-kun was actually on the ballot, I’d actually have to give pause. But it’s not, so fuck the Lambda Driver, Spiral Power all the way.

    2. One of the contestant is Batman’s mecha. You don’t vote against that. That is like dividing by zero or some shit.

    3. You a cop? You know you gotta tell me if you’re a cop.

    4. The only spider tanks I’ll hold any admiration for are the ones Aquarion Assault and Aquarion Gespard turns into. Reluctant vote even though the Zeta has one ugly profile.

    5. I SHALL DRINK THE TEARS OF GETTER FAGS! RUB THEM BALLS!

    6. When all is said and done, Daiguard is just a boss borot actually capable of performing in the field. That goes against its very inner soul. A mecha turned against itself cannot stand. It also can’t fly or surf.

    7. Fuck, two of my nominations against each other. Well, it’s a good thing EO never specified whether this Mazinger Z was the original or the new one. I hold little love for the original, but a whole lot for the Shin, so I’ll let it be penalized for the ambiguity and go with the Messiah.

    8. Not a fan of metal, but very much a fan of bulldozers. People jizz themselves over the giant shuriken on a rubber band, but the Delphine’s shining moments was when it donned heavy armor and fucked the chest cavities of its enemies with a big hard throbbing spike. Rule 34, someone make it happen.

  2. zabilegacy says:

    Rahxephon is such a well designed robot. It has so much going for it. It’s a massive nod to the classic design of the Raideen. It looks unique and easily stands out whenever it takes action. And its otherworldly design does an amazing job of conveying the otherworldly and mysterious nature of the robot. I know it’s a longshot considering it’s likely much stronger competition, but if it were to go all the way? I would probably give a small cheer.

    • It won’t go far, but it should go through this round.

      • zabilegacy says:

        Oh of course not. That would require beating Exia/Big O and Gurren Lagann. The day Raxephon wins a popularity contest against Gurren Lagann is the day that cardboard box gundam wins the day. I just personally think Rahxephon’s design in one of the top tier designs in the competition.

  3. JoeQ says:

    1. HAX THE HEAVENS!
    2. Bark all you want, the pixie dust will still end up as pieces of scrap on Big O knuckles. Again.
    3. Whatcha gonna do when we come for you…
    4. Fuck both of these ugly things.
    5. Fuck those rapist balls.
    6. Baa, ba ba Baa, ba ba Baa, ba ba Bara rara rara ra…
    7. Shining in the name of Zeus!
    8. IT COMES FROM HELL!

  4. 1. Gurren Lagann
    Because I have no idea what is the other robot
    2. Exia
    Because swords
    3. RahXephon
    Looks better
    4. Zeta Gundam
    Spider tank is awesome, but I prefer a spider tank with a Macross Cannon mounted on it.
    5. Zeorymer
    NEVER VOTING FOR GETTER, and it looks better.
    6. Nirvash
    Surfing in mid air.
    7. VF-25
    Perfect machine
    8. Delphine
    Try chasing it when its running at full speed.

  5. megaroad1 says:

    It’s a darn shame that VF-25 and Mazinger have to knock each other out so early in the tournament…Tought vote that one…

  6. Matt Wells says:

    Two major clarifications: One, Big O has enough heavy artillery to sink a SDF-1 level battleship. Missile bays, eye beams, forehead lasers, grappling hook chains, O-Thunder, and the very Wave Motion Cannon-esque Final Stage. The majority of it’s weaponry is in fact long range. It’s a mass produced, and the most well rounded unit of the Big Megadeus line, able to operate in both land, air and sea. It doesn’t even need to MOVE to wipe out Exia from a mile away.

    Exia is a MELEE RANGE REAL ROBOT, which is in itself a logical paradox. By your very own criteria and that of others, BIG O IS MORE OF A REAL ROBOT THAN EXIA. And it’s a real robot slower than Giant Robo. Sexy silhouette nothing, Exia is more of super robot wannabee than the Alteisen and the Arblest put together. And there’s nothing lamer than a super robot pretending to be a real robot, as the Gundam Wing boys made plain long ago.

    Two: “Well, some people are super loyal to the stink they love. Other people appreciate a damn good robot.” Zeorymer? A damn good robot? AHA HA HA BITCH PLEASE. I would take less issue with this statement if Zeorymer did have a genuinely aestheticly pleasing design. But it doesn’t. Zeorymer is your average over-designed, clunky, 80′s OVA model kit piece of garbage. It’s proportions are spindly. It’s profile is unmemorable. And it’s major design feature is three golden ball bearings. Which it rubs together.

    It isn’t without it’s good points. It has a wonderful theme song (stolen from Kamen Rider Black), it makes the same noises as the proton packs from Ghostbusters. It was designed by a long dead rapist psycopath who cotinues to troll everyone even in death. It’s engine is a cute android girl that turns into a creepy Soriyama-by-way-of-Geiger exoskeleton. But as designs for world destroying death machines go, it’s wholly UNMEMORABLE. Even Ideon looked better than Zeorymer, and that was three red space trucks welded together. And the last thing any Super Robot design should be is forgettable. Lanstar of the Winds was a far better design, and that was destroyed in the first episode. Banpresto’s expy of it, the Granzon, is far more pleasing in terms of aesthetics AND sheer brokeness.

    Getter Robo is three robots in one, and two of those are great, memorable and fun designs (the other is tank with a fat ass, but Getter 3 is always useless anyway). Shin Getter doesn’t start of as robots, it actually starts off as three fighter jets that combine to make mecha. Hmmm… fighter jets that transform into different mechanical humanoids depending on the tactical situation… where have I seen that before? Oh yeah, I remember now! That Japanimation cartoon you’re a big fan of! Robotech, wasn’t it?

    That’s right: Getter Robo is the Super Robot ancestral design inspiration for the Valkyrie. Whereas the Valkyrie is one machine with three different forms, Shin Getter is three robots formed by three jets slamming together at speeds in excess of Mach 2. In versatility, speed, iconica, design, pracitcality AND pilots, Shin Getter beats Zeorymer hands down in every single way. And those same idiots you slander for being loyal to the shit that they genuinely happen to find aestheticly appealing? One of them went on to create Gurren Lagann. You think he’d rather see his creation go up against some plot armoured pretender, or the Spiral Nemesis incarnate?

    Spot on with pretty much everything else though. That paragraph on the Nirvash was goddamn beautfiul.

    • whatsht says:

      I remember reading somewhere that Kawamori had the gerwalk idea long ago, then when he was working on Macross, the model of the VF-1 had shitty legs which swing down and Kawamori was like “ITS GERWALK!” and proceed to add gerwalk into the robot. Getter being the ancestor of the Valkyrie doesn’t make sense.

    • whatsht says:

      And declaring the Valkyrie as a rip off of Getter doesn’t work. If its Aquarion then fine.

      • Matt Wells says:

        THIS IS SAI-MECHA MY ARGUMENTS DON’T HAVE TO MAKE SENSE. And the Valkyrie isn’t a Getter rip-off, I’m merely postulating that the concept of a jet transforming into a variable robot was done by the Getter first. It’s as much an ancestor of the VF-1 as Raideen is.

        • Reid says:

          Matt’s right. Getter Robo is clearly no the design inspiration for the jets-with-legs we all know and love from Macross, but it IS the inspiration for design concept of a transforming jet with a lot different forms.That’s why SRW, God’s own final word on everything meta when it comes to robot anime, has the Holy Trinity of Robots as Mazinger Z (Super Robots), Getter Robo (Transformable Robots), Gundam (Real Robots). Know your role or shut your mouth, haters.

          • Matt Wells says:

            I could kiss you for this. SOMEBODY GET THIS MAN A GLOCK. Haters gonna hate, but you gotta respect Shin Getter’s Shine (Spark).

          • Reid says:

            lol I’d rather you didn’t, ol boy ol pal, but thanks just the same…I guess.

    • Reid says:

      That Nirvash write-up was a thing of great splendor; of this there is no doubt. Otherwise, Ghost’s mini-essays here are mixed bag of some spot-on choices and some questionable rationalizations. So typical of these Macrossfags. They can’t make up their mind about what’s cool and what’s not that they have to have a robot that’s two or three different things when they all pretty much do the same thing.

  7. Andaer says:

    So you take the Wing Gundam Zero for Shin Getter? If I hadn’t already voted for the getter I definitifly would now! Call me a Getterfag, hereby I proudly oppose myself to the Macrossfags, no Variable Fighter shall survive the coming carnages!

    You would never be able to controll the Zero System! Nor would you withstand the everlasting will of the Getter!

  8. Reid says:

    In the words of that great American, USAF Col. William Guile, this round of voting was “TOO EEEZY.”

    1. TTGL – Gurren Lagann is too much high power for the lump of vanilla guano that is the Arbalest. I mean, come on, one throws galaxies like throwing stars and the other one has a throwing knife…why does a robot need a throwing knife. It wasn’t even cool when the Zeon remnants’ Lakers-purple Ifrit Custom did this in ep. 4 of Gundam Unicorn. Gurren Lagann by a landslide. Maybe you dolts who nominated that other…thing will get a grip and stop picking it.
    2. Exia – As much as I love the Big O…well, really I don’t love it that much (Giant Robo is better), I guess I am more ambivalent toward Exia…? Whatever. Swords are cool. Exia is the spiritual successor to Epyon, my favorite Gundam.
    3. RahXephon – not a hard choice at all. RahXephon has got to get the nod here. The Alphonse units are kinda cool and everything but, like Ghost said, that cockpit design was a horrible idea both in and out of the fictional universe of the Patlabor stories.
    4. MSZ-006 – I believe in the sign of Zeta, even beyond the hard times from now.
    5. Sh_n G_tt_r R_b_ – it’s the will of life itself that Zeorymer fall in this battle. IMA KA SO NO TOKI DA!!!!
    6. Nirvash – Never saw the show, don’t care, gotta vote Nirvash on this one. Just tell the teacher I’m surfin’…surfin’ trapar waves.
    7. VF-25 – Fighter jets are cool, even when they have legs (especially when they have legs).
    8. Mazinkaiser SKL – Tell ya’ll what: whenever MFing LOUDNESS performs the theme song for the next season of Broken Blade then I’ll MAYBE consider voting for it….SIIIIIIIIIIIKE. Mazinkaiser SKL doesn’t even care about what happens in this tournament because it’s a freakin’ robot and it already got a hotter girlfriend that any of you losers who vote for a robot called “Dolphin.” Besides, Amon 6 and Lucifer 4 are double-teaming Queen Sigyn as we speak. And that stuck-up ho is loving every second of it. DEATH TO ALL BUT METAL!!!!

  9. The Shockmaster says:

    1. Gotta go with the Arbalest here. While TTGL might be considered a better show, I’m not too fond of the mech and the design doesn’t do anything for me. The arm slaves on the other hand are a nice realization of military use robots with human motion. While I’m not the biggest fan of the lambda driver it does provide for a nice sequence at the end of TSR.

    2. Poor Big O, if this was based on overall show aesthetic or art direction you would advance. However Exia clinches this for possessing possibly my favorite combo weapon in all of the Gundamverse, outside of beam scarves of course, that shield/sword/gun thing. Just imagining it on a Hi-Nu or Tallgeese III is exhilarating.

    3. Feathery wings on a mech? Minus five stars; I’m pleasantly surprised to see my nomination of the Ingram paid off. That said, my support for this fantastic machine won’t die and I’m backing it all the way to Garhalla. Nothin’ Impossible

    4. The Zeta is one of my least favorite lead Gundams, it is only better than the Strike Freedom. Why couldn’t Titans’ colors MK II be the hero? If I wanted magic I’d go to Byston Well, so magical spider walker from some show about little girls you are gonna lose to a mech powed by souls piloted by a girl.

    5. There are probably a few people that genuinely prefer Zeorymer of the Heavens. I’ll ask them to forgive me when I see them in hell. Guts Guts Getter Guts

    6. Sorry Nirvash if I was gonna vote for a flying car I would have nominated Bry-Thunder. Instead I nominated Dai-Guard. Office workers winning the round

    7. On one hand we have an invincible castle of steel and on the other a transforming plane that isn’t painted red and lacks sound boosters. Kawamori are you even trying? This round has got to Uncle Go’s original Supaa Roboto.

    8. If this was Sai-world building, Break Blade beats SKL. But the “w” here goes to the mech with a giant skeletal Pegasus motorcycle.

    When did Moe ever use a robot to poke/slap Curly and Larry?

  10. Pingback: Mecha Monday: Reactions to Sai Mecha Earth Side, Round 1 | Moar Powah!

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