[Click image for Tengen Toppa size, if you can’t handle that, here’s something smaller]
With the end of Star Driver, which threw a gigantic Hail Mary pile of robot sparkles in its final episode, Winter ends and so does the interesting run of robot shows from last year. The real winter of robot anime has begun. But no need to hibernate and warm yourselves by (re)watching SDF Macross or fapping to your backlog while waiting for the next episodes of Broken Blade, Mazinkaiser SKL, or Gundam Unicorn. The Super Dimensional Robot Tournament SAI MECHA is here. You can take out your frustrations on other people by flaming them and the robots they like!
In presenting the robots each round in the tourney site I need to write impartially, but here on WRL I’m here to campaign for my picks. I don’t need to hold back. Fags be crushed, but suck it up. There’s only ONE Acguy Freedom trophy and it’ll be in the hands of a robot I love. SUCK IT GETTERFAGS, Oh wait, no Getter Robo made it into the tourney. NVM then!
If you voted for Evangelion Unit 01 Test Type
…you want to hump your mother… in front of your dad… who’ll probably get off on it. You musn’t run away! Vote for the VF-25 Messiah instead and really hump your mother (or at least your hot idol girlfriend while she wears your mom’s kimono).
If you voted for RX-0 Unicorn Gundam
…you want to be a magic girl and get raped by Kyubei, who can turn you into a Newtype. Vote for the Gunbuster instead and save the fucking galaxy.
If you voted for Tachikoma
…you covertly wish this were SaiMoe instead. GTFO. Vote for Mazinkaiser SKL and watch all your manliness EVAPORATE IN A PILLAR OF FLAME in the presence of the INVINCIBLE KAISER OF STEEL.
If you voted for Giant Robo
…you don’t even like robot anime. GTFO. Giant Robo is big, slow, full of ugly rivets, and is a fake Egyptian. Everybody knows the Gurren Mk. II has the best cockpit in anime, all years (at least while Kallen’s in it).
If you voted for ∀ Gundam
…you hate Japan and want them all its people to perish in a moonlight butterfly so Gundam can be set in America. Shame on you! Vote for the VF-1S instead because you know it’s the real synthesis of Japanese imagination with American design.
If you voted for Evangelion Unit 02 Production Type
…you hate America and are a lame covert Axis like the JapKraut that pilots it. Vote for the NZ-666 Kshatriya instead and be a JapKraut IN SPACE WHERE THERE ISN’T EVEN AN AMERICA!
If you voted for MS-07B Gouf Custom
…you’re a filthy Zeke who hates Guntanks! USA! USA! Vote Gao Gai Gar instead and KNOW THE JOY OF BEING POWERED BY COURAGE!
If you voted for Hyaku Shiki
…you’re a filthy Zeke who’s PRETENDING NOT TO BE! Vote for the Sinanju instead and be an authentic Zeke even if you’re a fake Character (LOL THE PUN THAT HAS THE POWER TO DESTROY THE EARTH FEDERATION).
Now that you can’t possibly do it wrong, go vote in the Sai Mecha tournament!